Man falls into vault toilet at campground, reminding us nothing is worth retrieving from a toilet

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Here are some tips for your next camping trip. Stay on the marked paths and if anything falls into a campground vault toilet, it now belongs to the campground vault toilet.

You don’t want to be the one needing to be rescued after wandering off a trail, and you certainly don’t want first responders called to get you out of a vault toilet because you fell in trying to retrieve the sunglasses you dropped.

If I were the guy who was rescued last Saturday afternoon at Camp Edison in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada mountains, I’m telling people I got lost in the woods. But then again, I would never be in that situation in the first place.

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Outhouse with two brown doors and trash bins in a forest setting

I’m a drop something in the toilet, and it belongs to that toilet kind of guy. I couldn’t imagine the thought of even attempting to reach into a port-a-potty or a vault toilet crossing my mind. Perhaps I’m the one out of touch.

Whatever it is, I’m getting a new one. It’s not worth it. The sunglasses might have been expensive or a great fit for a head that sunglasses don’t normally fit well on, but they weren’t meant to remain in my possession.

They would have belonged to the human waste. This guy had other plans and the Fresno County Sheriff’s Office said that he fell into the waterless, non-flushing toilet, reports KTLA 5.

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Man entering a public toilet at a campground in a national park

He spent about 10 to 15 minutes down there before first responders were able to get him out and hose him off, which I think we all know wasn’t sufficient given the situation.

He needed at least a good day, day and a half, of constant showering, in my opinion. Through a Spanish translator, they let the man know that he “had fallen into the chemical storage tank.”

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There was no mention of the condition of the important, to the point of risking falling into a vault toilet, sunglasses. The man didn’t have any serious injuries and walked away “after being hosed down by Cal Fire.”

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