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Artificial intelligence has seeped into almost every aspect of modern life, helping users plan vacations, create workout routines and tackle countless everyday tasks. Some have resorted to using it for their love lives by asking chatbots to help them write witty responses to messages, craft dating app profiles and work out relationship issues. However, relationship experts fear that the increased use of AI in dating could lead to disastrous results.
“It’s making us relationally stupid,” Jackie Dorman, founder of the “Last Year Single” program, told Fox News Digital.
Dorman said that she’s increasingly seeing people turn to ChatGPT and other AI tools to help them navigate the dating market, warning that outsourcing conversations and emotional decision-making could interfere with the development of relationship skills.
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“That’s really the danger of all AI across the board in every area is that we are creative beings. We create, we think, we learn from our mistakes and we make new decisions. If we’re always outsourcing it to a computer, to technology, then we are not going to learn.”
She added that she has seen AI become part of nearly every stage of dating, from introductions and first impressions to breakups.
“They’re outsourcing their breakups to AI. They’re outsourcing, texting, they’re creating their dating profiles, and it makes them look really witty and really fun. And then you get in person and it’s like, ‘Is this the same person that wrote the dating profile?’ Because they’re not funny, they’re not witty,” she said. “So, it can make you seem like a great catch, but you still have to show up and be a great catch.”
Dorman is also concerned that AI could contribute to worsening human-to-human communication skills.
“You haven’t put in the reps of meeting people, saying stupid things, feeling embarrassed, learning how to converse with people,” she said.
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Dr. Christina Tracy Stein, a licensed marriage and family therapist, told Fox News Digital that AI can be a helpful tool at times, but she also cautioned against relying too heavily on chatbots and risking using them to replace authentic human communication.
“I think AI being used to help you organize your thoughts is really helpful, especially because when you’re overwhelmed and anxious or you don’t know how to navigate a situation,” she said.
Stein said that one crosses the line from using AI to being overly reliant on it when they stop trusting their own instincts.
“If we don’t pause and make sure to be like, ‘OK, this is information. I’m going to use this information to help me evaluate my situation or help me determine what feels authentic,’ that’s where it’s a problem when we’re not relying on ourselves,” Stein said.
Stein believes that rather than creating new problems, AI is exacerbating existing issues in the dating world. She said people have long presented idealized versions of themselves early in relationships and that AI simply makes it easier for them to polish that image.
“I work with a lot of couples, and I always talk about the big bait and switch. We put forward our best selves… and then once we’ve sold ourselves to this potential partner, then we let down our hair and stop doing the things that we sort of put out there in the beginning,” Stein said.
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Both Dorman and Stein also expressed concern about the rise of AI companions. Stein said relationships with AI are “very one-sided” because users face little accountability for how they behave.
“If you say something mean to your chat or Claude or you ignore it or you’re having a lack of awareness, there’s no consequence,” she said.
Dorman told Fox News Digital that she had mainly seen women having relationships with AI bots and suggested that it could be because they’re “not finding the emotional maturity they’re looking for in human men,” adding that chatbots can seem to be consistently caring and supportive.
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Ultimately, both Dorman and Stein warned that, while AI can be a useful tool, it should not replace the authenticity, vulnerability and imperfections that healthy relationships require.
“I hope that people will see that what makes you lovable is your imperfections. That’s what people fall in love with. They fall in love with your quirkiness,” Dorman said.
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